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20 Things I’ve Learned in My 20s

January 11, 2017 By MeghanGrant 6 Comments

Walkin' in High Cotton

Well, this is it, y’all.  Today is the last day in my 20s.  I’ve had some time to reflect and wanted to share some things I learned in my 20s.  What have you or did you learn in your 20s?

Wear SPF 50.

I used to worship the tanning bed when I was in high school, and was perhaps even addicted to the tanning bed in college.  I never wore sunscreen on beach days at Shakleford Banks.  And, y’all, I’m paying for it now.  I’m the poster child for why you should avoid tanning beds.  I have premature wrinkles and have had multiple pre-cancerous places removed.  And bless my mama’s heart.  She constantly battles melanoma and basil cell carcinoma, and we take our skin health really seriously now.  Don’t be like us.  Wear SPF every day.  See my letter to my 20 year old self about the tanning bed here.

Eat what you want, but make time for exercise.

This past summer, I posted a picture of one of my favorite summertime meals.  I love fried shrimp burgers in the summer.  And let’s be real.  I love anything fried.  I’m not even gonna lie.  But I realized after looking at pictures of myself, that my weight fluctuated and decreased in my 20s.  I never really changed how I ate (except when I was only eating fish and veggies for the 4 months before my wedding) but what did change was how hard I worked out.  Y’all, I feel better and look better in my clothes when I work out.  There’s no better reward for fried foods (or a glass of champagne) than a good workout!

Stop being so hard on yourself.

I think I’ll forever struggle with this.  Comparison can cripple me at times, but at other times, be the inspiration that I need for my goals.  I have to remind myself that I’m doing the best I can with what I have and that as long as I’m doing my best, that’s all that matters.

Quality v. Quantity.

I’d like to say that I’ve always known this, but sometimes, I let my judgment wane.  Quality is always more important than quantity.  I mentioned last week in my 2017 goals that I’m simplifying.  This is a prime example.  I’m much more intentional about what and who I’m letting in my space.  This is perhaps my biggest lesson entering my 30s.

Don’t half ass things.

I am notorious for overcommitting.  Most of the time, I don’t half ass things.  But there have been a few times where I overcommitted and couldn’t devote 100% of myself to my responsibilities.  And that is the worst feeling in the world.  I only want to commit to things I can give my full attention and energy to in my new decade.

It’s okay to still not to know what you want to be when you grow up.

I remember telling a student that I still wanted to name nail polish for OPI when I grew up.  I still don’t know what I want to be other than happy.  A friend once said “I love having conversations with you because I’ll get to hear what new dream you have.”  I struggle with complacency and I’m afraid that if I get too comfortable with something, then I’ve done something wrong and it’s time to move on.  I have dreams of owning a shop, of designing US History curriculum, of writing for Southern Poverty Law Center, of saving Eastern North Carolina with Vivan Howard, and of being a stay at home dog mom.  It really just depends on the day.  And you know what, I’m okay with it.  And maybe more importantly, so is DG.

Having feelings isn’t a bad thing.

I really don’t like showing my feelings.  I have always been sensitive and emotional, and there have been times in my life where people told me that wasn’t okay.  You know what.  It is okay to have feelings.  I cry at the smallest things.  A dog being loyal to its owner?  Winston snuggling me when I’ve had a bad day?  DG bringing me a chocolate milkshake just because?  I also am easily excited.  Also something I’m done apologizing for.

Forgiveness is important, but only when you’re ready.

I cannot stress the importance of forgiveness.   People make mistakes.  People hurt feelings intentionally and unintentionally.  I learned in my 20s that while forgiveness is important, it has to happen on your time.  It took me a while to forgive a few situations, but once I was ready, it was the most freeing moment.

It’s okay to say no, and not explain yourself.

Well, I clearly have struggled with this in the past.  It’s been on my goal list every year for a while.  But not in 2017.  I decided to take a different approach and focus on balance.  I am working on saying, “Sorry, I can’t.”  And not offering a reason why.  Who cares?  I just can’t.  Maybe it’s because I’d like to have dinner with DG.  Or catch up on things around our house.  Or just not wear real pants and snuggle my two fur balls on the couch while watching Fixer Upper.  Either way, it doesn’t matter, the answer is still no.

Own a rescue dog.  Or two.

I mean, is this one not self explanatory?  Winston & Gizmo have been the best parts of my life with DG.  Our love of them is maybe insane, but I mean, I can’t describe them any other way than saying they’re the best.  Winston is so good.  Just, so good.  He’s so well behaved, so loving, so patient, but yet, so stubborn.  He is hands down my “person.”  When I’ve had a bad day, he knows it and does whatever he can to comfort me.  When Gizmo is having a rough time with the front door or the mail man, he tries to distract him.  And Gizmo is the craziest, snuggliest, anxiety-ridden little dude, but he makes us laugh constantly.  We are so proud of his progress over the past 1.5 years, and he’s so appreciative and just plain fun.

Travel as much as you can, even if it’s not that far.

I keep harping on how we didn’t get to Europe.  To be quite honest, I actually considered myself a failure for a while because I haven’t experienced Europe yet.  Traveling is something that I really didn’t do much of until I was 19.  I distinctly remember my first trip to Charleston when I was a freshman in college and how invigorated I felt.  I then traveled to D.C. and NYC the next year, and my love for travel started then.  I have loved exploring with David and with my passion being about exposing people to parts of North Carolina that are forgotten, this has been a huge lesson for me.  Check out this day trip that my daddy planned for us last year.  Seriously, so cool.  Check out other adventures near and sorta far here.

Drink a lot (and I mean a LOT) of water.

My skin has never looked better and I’ve never felt lighter than when I drink enough water.  I do indulge in sparkling water (La Croix is my favorite), but that’s about as risky as I get now.

Always do what you want.

My BFF Amanda and I used to say “I do what I want.”  And I still mean that.  I have very few regrets from my 20s, because I realize how important those decisions were to shaping me, and how I truly feel I take advantage of opportunities.  I also am appreciative for parents and friends who let me make my own mistakes when I was in my 20s.  Regardless, I feel that it is really important to always do what you want.  Nothing wrong with cannonballing in and figuring it out as you go.

Trust your gut.

Trusting my instinct is something I really pride myself in.  I had a couple of reminders in my last year of my 20s when it came to people I let in my space and the trust I placed in them.  My gut has never let me down, and I’m going to guess yours hasn’t let you down either.  Trust it.  It’s never been wrong.

Try that food that you’re not quite sure of.

I remember my first meal at Poole’s Diner for my 24th birthday.  Literally, I ate at Poole’s one month before I met DG.  That is how vivid my memory is of the best culinary experience I had to date.  I have loved trying new food in my 20s, and will continue to try new things.

Stop procrastinating and follow your heart.

I have found myself saying that I’ll wait for the right time or that I’ll wait for enough money.  I learned there’s never a right time or enough money, so we’re going to go forward because life’s too short, right?

Dreams sometimes change.  And that’s okay.

As I mentioned above, I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.  When I was 20, I wrote a list of goals and dreams that I had for those ten years.  I also wrote a 30 before 30 list about a year and a half ago.  There are things on that list that are irrelevant and others that are still applicable.  Either way, it’s interesting to see how dreams and goals change with age and life circumstances.  And you know what, that’s okay.

Buy a really good mascara.

It’s taken me about 15 years to find the right mascara.  But I’ve finally found it.  And I’ll never go back.

Celebrate everything.  Every. Single. Thing.

Life’s too short to not celebrate the small (and large) victories in life.  We still celebrate the anniversary of our engagement.  We celebrate small milestones, like when DG got his LLC last year.  We celebrate our boys birthdays AND adoptiversaries.  And I hope that’s something we never stop doing, because dang it.  It’s important.

And most importantly, buy the damn shoes.

When I was 22, I bought a pair of Louboutins with my first ever big girl pay check.  I will NEVER get rid of them, and I will always wear them with pride.  The only other time I bought expensive shoes?  For my wedding day.  Buy the damn shoes.  You won’t regret it.

xx

Linking up with Jenn & Jessi


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Filed Under: Life Lately, Lifestyle Tagged With: 2017, Goals, North Carolina, Raleigh, relationships

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Alyssa says

    January 11, 2017 at 8:55 am

    This is great. Being in my mid-20s now there are definitely a few things on this list I could still learn from or work on. Thanks for sharing your decade’s story and I hope that the next gives you just as much joy, knowledge, and fulfillment!

  2. Karly says

    January 11, 2017 at 11:12 am

    I absolutely love everything about this post! I think all of these things are what 20-somethings should take a look at and learn and/or adopt into their own life. I love that you never stop dreaming – that is really inspiring to me as someone who has lost her way a little bit the last couple years. Cheers to your 20s, and here’s to your big 3-0!

  3. Chana Lynn says

    January 11, 2017 at 1:45 pm

    Great post! I have to say I agree with everything you sugggested and as I enjoy my last 2 days of the 40s (!) I feel like your list is still exactly on point as I am raising two teenage daughters, working, traveling, etc. And we just adopted our second rescue kitty! Wishing you all the best for your 30’s…enjoy! Happy birthday fellow Capricorn. It’s a wonderful time ahead of you!!

  4. Kate at Green Fashionista says

    January 11, 2017 at 5:21 pm

    Yessss to all of this! Especially quality over quantity! Happy Birthday Eve girl, welcome to the most fabulous decade yet <3
    Green Fashionista

  5. Caroline says

    January 11, 2017 at 6:55 pm

    I love this so much. I’m an emotional person too and it can sometimes get me into trouble. I think that you are fantastic and you should be proud of what you have accomplished. Life also gets better in your thirties!!! I’m going to be 37 this year (gaahh!) and when I look back to my twenties I definitely learned a lot. Stay true to who you are, try not to worry about what other people think, and always remember what is really important in your life. Happy Birthday a day early to you too!! 🙂

  6. Courtney says

    January 13, 2017 at 10:41 am

    Happy birthday hun! I absolutely LOVE this post! I’m approaching my last full year of my 20s soon and will absolutely keep these all in mind! I love the one about it being okay to show your feelings. That was something I’ve recently learned. And for the record, I LOVE how excited you always are!

    Xo,
    Courtney
    http://www.courtneyfashionista.com

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Cheers to the weekend, y’all! 🥂 I hope you ha Cheers to the weekend, y’all! 🥂 I hope you have a good one and take some time for yourself. Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3d94o @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
Happy Friday Eve, friends! I recently stayed @thec Happy Friday Eve, friends! I recently stayed @thecolonialinnhillsborough and loved everything about it! It’s a perfect mix of historic preservation and modern touches and you feel right at home. Don’t skip the morning coffee and homemade cinnamon rolls either! Check out the link in my profile for a travel guide to @hillsboroughnc & enjoy all the charms of this town, including The Colonial Inn. It’s a quick drive from Raleigh and offers a whole lot of charm! 📸: @gloryrozephotography
Today's weather had me daydreaming about a French Today's weather had me daydreaming about a French picnic at a park like this one from last year. 🌿 Also, I shared 5 spring essentials, including a big sun hat like this one from @lackofcoloraus or the other go-to in my closet from @brixton. I've left the link in my profile if you're interested in checking out the other 4! 🤩 I hope you had a great Monday! ✨ Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3cOXe @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
Happy Sunday, y’all. I kept the Sunday scaries a Happy Sunday, y’all. I kept the Sunday scaries away today thanks to some time in the sun, crossing things off my to do list, and starting a new book. Are you reading anything you can’t put down right now? I just started this earlier today and am about halfway through. It’s so good! Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3cJd1 @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
I've loved all this warm weather this week despite I've loved all this warm weather this week despite the pollen haze we've been experiencing in North Carolina. I have this @amazon dress in a solid red and a couple of different prints, which is perfect for spring and summer. Over on IFT today, I'm sharing 5 spring essentials, so use the link in my profile to see more! 🌿 On another note, what are you up to this weekend? We have a day date set for both tomorrow and Sunday and I'm looking forward to spending some time with @dgrantsoccer. ✨Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3cxD2 @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
David & I have started sketching out our ideas for David & I have started sketching out our ideas for our front porch planting this year. One of the silver linings I found from last year was being able to spend so much time on this porch and actually enjoy the flowers we planted. 🌿 Who knew making a point to water the plants every day was a crucial key to having a green thumb. 🙃 I'm excited to share this process in the coming weeks and in the meantime, here's a throw back to my favorite part of our porch. ✨ Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3ceV2 @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
Today over on IFT, I’m sharing my reflections fr Today over on IFT, I’m sharing my reflections from a month of taking a social media less Sunday (inspired by @graceatwood). I’ll be making this a somewhat normal occurrence! Check out the link in my profile for this post (and stay for the other content 🙃). Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3cay6 @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
I recently spent a chilly, beautiful evening in @h I recently spent a chilly, beautiful evening in @hillsboroughnc with @gloryrozephotography. The sunset over the Eno was 🤩. This outfit is one of my favorites to pull out for colder temperatures and this sweater is currently on major sale. P.S. Head over to my stories to check out a preview of some of what Glory & I did while we were in Hillsborough. Also, local folks, don't forget to enter the giveaway I'm cohosting over on my previous post. Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3c0Kd @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
✨Giveaway closed.✨ Congratulations to @juliefh ✨Giveaway closed.✨ Congratulations to @juliefhair! 🎉Check your DMs to claim your prize. If you’re looking for plans in April, look no further than a trip to Pittsboro to explore the shops, the outdoor trails, and make a stop at the Carolina Brewery Pittsboro location on April 10 for a shrimp boil and a tapping party for their newest brew: Costero Mexican Lager! The event is from 12:00pm-11:00pm so be sure to stop by! 

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While this picture is a couple of years old, my en While this picture is a couple of years old, my enthusiasm for spring is the same! ✨ I’ve been enjoying the sunshine and the warmth these past couple of days. I’ve linked a few of my favorite maxis that I’m loving this year. Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3bJyz @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
Don't mind me, just still over here still celebrat Don't mind me, just still over here still celebrating that there is a @samjonesbbq in Raleigh. 🎉 I could eat this bbq sandwich with mac & cheese every day, y'all. ✨ Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3bEA1 @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
Happy Saturday and welcome to the new faces that a Happy Saturday and welcome to the new faces that are around here today! Thanks to @kristywharvey and @beaufort_linen_company for their shout outs in their IG Stories today! 😘 I'm thrilled you're here!⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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I'm Meghan and I share snaps here of my favorite spots around @visitnc and what I wore while eating and sipping bubbles while there. I've been writing about North Carolina for 5 years over at www.imfixintoblog.com and include other topics like favorite fashion finds, beauty, my fluffy boys (Winston & Gizmo), and women owned businesses. If you head over to my website and sign up for my email newsletter, you'll get my North Carolina Bucket List in a downloadable PDF, too. ✨⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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If you're here because of Kristy & Christina, head over to the link in my profile for my Beaufort travel guide where I featured some of my favorite things to do in this quaint, charming coastal town.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Thank you for being here! 🎉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3buOH @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
I've had this @madewell blouse from years now (pic I've had this @madewell blouse from years now (pictured here @fearrington_village in 2017) and it's still one of my go-tos in my closet. It comes in a blue & white stripe version as well, which I have my eye on this season. I just love the cut, the fabric, and how breezy it is for humid North Carolina days. Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details of this throwback look with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3bm8k @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @tammytorresphoto
I’ve been loving this manicure that @_embellishn I’ve been loving this manicure that @_embellishnailstudio_ created at my last appointment. It reminds me of a peacock and I love the black and gold accents. Also, this bracelet stack is a fun one for spring and summer, so I’ve linked some of my favorites on this link. Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3bhqn @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
Throwing it back on this Tuesday to this bright ou Throwing it back on this Tuesday to this bright outfit from a year ago. This top was another fun @amazonfashion find and I got a lot of wear out of it pre-Covid. I can’t wait to pull it out of my closet again. ✨Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3bcbp @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
I spent the weekend @wilmingtoncoast with my dear I spent the weekend @wilmingtoncoast with my dear friend @ecweeks eating my way through delicious spots, like @brasseriedusoleil (be sure to ask for Jeremy as your server!) and staying at the historic @blockaderunnerbeachresort! I picked up several new spring dresses from @amazonfashion for the trip, including this one that I paired with my favorite OTK boots since it ended up being a bit chillier. Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details plus other Amazon spring dress favorites with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3b7tj @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
Welcoming spring and warding off the Sunday scarie Welcoming spring and warding off the Sunday scaries tonight. 🌷 I hope you had a lovely weekend and have a great week! ✨ Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3aPbx @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
I am *so excited* to welcome @samjonesbbq to Ralei I am *so excited* to welcome @samjonesbbq to Raleigh! As an eastern NC native, I'm a chopped BBQ with vinegar sauce enthusiast. I'm thrilled to have this back home favorite in Raleigh, located right downtown on Lenoir St. My go-to order is a BBQ sandwich with slaw and macaroni & cheese + a glass of cava. They do have delicious collards, too! Be sure you stop by and enjoy their outdoor space and a great meal! Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3aJUw @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
Last week was a beautiful taste of spring and the Last week was a beautiful taste of spring and the bright times to come. Though it's been a chilly, gray start to the week, I'm always looking for bright spots, so I'm excited for another @offlineraleighdurham experience this week! Join me in trying something new in our city every month and get your first month free using code meghangrant. P.S. Don't forget your mask! Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3aATo @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog 📸: @gloryrozephotography
Daylight Savings Time got me like... 😴🥱☕️ Have a good week, y’all! 💕 Screenshot this pic to get shoppable product details with the LIKEtoKNOW.it shopping app or ➡️ http://liketk.it/3aw3l @liketoknow.it #liketkit #imfixintoblog
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